Hacked – And Restored.

This morning, I was trying to log into my Facebook account only to realize that someone has hacked into my Hotmail account and changed both my email and Facebook password.

I got kind of worried and frustrated because I was wondering what the hacker would have done to my Facebook account, since it was a public platform about my life and it contains all my personal information about myself and my friends. It would be really embarrassing if my account started posting indecent statuses and pictures on my wall/my friends’ walls, which happens very often.

Thankfully, it was rather convenient for me to report the issue to Hotmail admin, and all I had to do was to fill certain information about myself to let them identify that I am the true owner of my account, eg. my first and last name, birth date, who I recently emailed and received emails from. Within minutes, Hotmail recognized that all my information are right and asked me to renew my password before restoring my account back to me.

And so, I found out that the hacker changed my settings to Chinese, and used my account to log in to a weird Chinese game, and also added an email to my account, which doesn’t even belong to me. I am still trying to discover what he did to my account and am still in the midst of rectifying them.

But still, thank God that I managed to retrieve back my accounts. As much as I was left feeling really angry about my accounts being hacked into by an unknown person, I was also reminded of God’s goodness through this incident.

The bible says that the devil has come to steal, kill and destroy. Hacking into our Facebook accounts is like a direct reflection of how the devil finds his way through to intrude into our lives to take control and make a mess out of it. Nowadays, our Facebook accounts are like books of records written about our lives. It contains all our daily activities, the things we do and say, the snapshots of our everyday lives, the bits and pieces of the interactions we make and relationships we have. It is just like how in heaven; God keeps a record of the things we do, think, say, and one day, which we will eventually have to account for when we meet Him face to face.

When we are standing right with God, we have the right and access to control our own lives. We get to decide what we want to upload and post up, we have complete freedom and liberty to interact with people and do the things we want. When this happens, we are granted the autonomy to our individual lives: we hold the access to our account -the key to the destiny of our lives lies in our own hands.

During certain seasons in life, the devil comes along secretly and finds his way to get into our lives. When we are not careful and allow him to creep into certain areas of our lives, our password gets stolen and changed. Our password is something very private and personal to us, and it is usually something that only we know by ourselves. Similarly, our password is just like secrets about our lives that we didn’t tell anyone, and they may refer to sins that we have never confessed nor told anyone about. When we choose to keep our deepest secrets on the devil’s side instead of in the light, it is like taking the keys to our lives from God and handing them over to the devil. The authority of your password which has not been surrendered to Him gets transferred to the devil – and you lose access of your own account. The thief begins to do things do your life that you have never ever wanted to do: use your account to post information that you don’t even true on your wall, change your settings, use your account to spam and inconvenience others, thwart your account into something that does not even reflect your life.  

Isn’t this how the devil usually stains our lives with mistakes and turns it into a total mess, manipulates us to make us feel ashamed and embarrassed, and makes us into people that we were not called to be? When the keys to our own lives do not lie in our own hands, we are always struggling because we are now held bondage by the devil who is the only one who has access to our lives.

Thank God, that Hotmail and Facebook know are aware of the problem of hackers and have a backup plan to detect the right owners of the accounts and restore it back to us. If even they have such a plan, of course our God has a greater plan to restore what the thief has stolen away from us.

Hotmail recognizes that I am the true owner because I am familiar with my personal info, and am able to offer them information regarding what I have been using my account for. Similarly, the solution to redeeming our lives back from the devil is to acknowledge your true identity and right standing with Christ again. When God created us, He knew every single detail of us and our past history completely, and is able to recognize us immediately as long as we choose to acknowledge ourselves as a child of God and offer our lives to Him all over again. There and then, He gives us the chance to renew our password and get our accounts back. Our Redeemer is able to pick up any mess left behind by the devil, to be washed clean of the stains, restored, renewed, and returned back to our hands again.

Well, I still feel a little upset with that unknown guy who managed to log into my account without my permission, for intruding into my private space and meddled with things which belong to me. But then again, because of this incident, I praise God from the bottom of my heart. I am thankful that my life is being held in the hands of a loving Father who gives me complete freedom and liberty, instead of the destroyer who only wants to take control of my life and turn it upside down. I thank God that He recognizes me as His daughter, and washed away all my stains so that I can start anew, and allow Him to write every page of my life.

I thank God that I was lost, but now I’m found. Now I belong to my Abba Father.

Chervelle.

In Feb 2008, my mum finally gave the approval for me and my sisters to go for our water baptism. As a pretty young Christian then, one thing that I was even more excited about than the baptism itself was the opportunity to get a myself baptism name, then I dont have to go through the hassle of not having a english name which is easier to remember by most people. 

Stranger: “Hi, what’s your name?”

Me: “Khang Leng.”

Stranger: “Kang..what? Ling? Leng? Ning?”

Me: “Khang Leng, or Kang Ning.”

And 5 mins later……. they forgot my name.

A few days before I had to submit my baptism application form with my baptism name, I was sitting in my CCA room with my laptop, trying to google for nice Christian names online. I was determined to find a nice and special name that its more girly, unique, and it must be nice! I wanted to find a name that suits my personality, something that I can feel comfortable being called by other people – for the rest of my life. And so when it came to the choice of my baptism name, I was extremely particular about it.

However, I sat in front of my laptop for hours and read through thousands of  names, but I still couldnt find any name that caught my attention.  Nothing sounded special enough, or personal enough to me. I got so vexed about it that I started smsing different people to ask them what should my name be (Because I was so desperate), and I started sighing all the way in the CCA room that everyone came and ask me what was I so frustrated about.

“Oh. I dont know what my name should be.” They thought I was crazy and was having some identity crisis problem.

I made a little prayer to God and told Him I believe that since water baptism is significant milestone in my walk with Him, definitely my baptism name would mean something to Him, and to me as well. I didnt just want a normal name, but I wanted a revelation of His work in my life through my name. And so I continued the search for my ’new identity’, believing that I will know it clearly in my heart when the name for me appears before my eyes. 

And so it did.

After 3-4 hours of searching, reasearching, ONLY this, ONE particular name caught my attention. And something in me just tugged my heart and told me that this is it.

Name: Chevelle
Meaning: God is my vow

I didnt know how and I didnt know why when I saw this name, I was so excited that I jumped up and started cheering excitedly. I’m not trying to exaggerate here but really, I was so happy that everyone in the room knew that I finally found my name. Today, when I meet up with my friends who were in the room that day and were already used to calling me ‘Khang Leng’ then, they call me ‘Chervelle’ sometimes too and often tease me about how I first found my name. Haha.

I eventually took the baptism name “Chervelle” instead of Chevelle because i thought it looks nicer and more unique. And I guess many of you noticed that my blog’s header/twitter info has always been “God is My Promise”. The meaning of my name was where it came from :)

March 10, 2008

I never really had a genuine revelation of my baptism name, until one of the MJ zone prayer meetings.

I was feeling rather dry and was desperately seeking for God’s presence that night. I was asking Him why is it that sometimes I cannot feel Him and I cannot find Him, while other people can seem to experience Him so freely. I asked why is it that sometimes it is just so hard to know that He is really with me.

It was then that I heard a soft tugging in my heart, asking me, “What is your name?”

I answered, “Chervelle. Chervelle means God is my promise.”

And then I got it. I realised that God wanted me to know, by saying that He is my promise, it meant that God has already given me His full assurance, and His word that He will be with me no matter what circumstances I am in, no matter how I am like. Even during times when I cannot feel Him, or cannot find Him, He is always here beside me. He also told me that my life will be His greatest promise and testimony to me, that He is with me, all the days of my life.

Until today, I dont really know whether the webpage where I found my baptism name and interpretation is really credible. Maybe it was all made up by the person who created the site, and probably the meaning is not even true. But actually, it doesnt really matter anymore. Because what’s more important is that I have my personal revelation of what I should be called and who I am :)

I thank God that I am Chervelle,
because I know He is always with me :)

Nice hangouts!

I just recalled that I have yet to blog about some of the awesome places that JC and I went recently!

I got my first pay cheque from my company a few weeks ago, and decided to look for a nice place for dinner for the both of us! And so, we went to With A Pinch of Salt cafe, which was very near to where my primary school/secondary school in the Tanjong Katong area. Never knew that they had such a nice and cosy place in this area!

Hehe I loved the place once I stepped into it because I’ve always loved cute and colorful stuff, and this cafe made me feel really happy. I think it was the kind of cafe that I could feel at home at (and feel like a little kid), instead of being in an atas cafe and having to act high class. Hahaha oops.

And the food was not bad as well! Even the menu is so adorable.

JC lovedddd the escargots.

I like the ham and mushroom pizza hehe. Perfect combination.

One of the best part of it all was that the prices here are really affordable as compared to other cafes! I guess it is partly because they are located near various secondary schools and are catered more for students. That makes it a even better deal for us to visit there for affordable good food! Hehe.

After dinner, JC suggested going to The Cheesecake Cafe for dessert. At first I was a little hesitant because it was located at Siglap (which sounded really ulu for me), and I have never heard of the place before. But to my surprise, the place didn’t even look like a cafe at all!

The cafe had a very victorian-style interior design, and there were paintings, statues everywhere! When I said everywhere, I meant even the toilet too! Haha. Its a nice cosy place, and has a very classy feel. Quite a nice place place for nice cheesecakes and to chill!

So these were 2 nice places we went that I would like to recommend you guys! I’m not trying to become a food blogger or anything, but I UNDERSTAND that sometimes its really so difficult to find nice eating places to chill and hang out in Singapore! Everywhere is either too crowded, too expensive, or we’re too sick of the places because we’ve been going there too often. JC and I face that problem every single time, and I know you guys do too. Haha.

So.. if you guys are looking for new places, can try these 2 hangouts! I kinda like them and hope you all will as well!

If you have any nice eating places, please recommend me too :D

The Best Days.

This video made me smile and tear at the same time. So many memories :’)

If I could, I would want to go through SOT all over again. Beyond all the friends, experiences, ministry that made it so special, it was the closeness of God to me during this period that made SOT 2011 much more memorable than anything else.

1 year has passed, but I don’t ever want to lose that hunger I had, the desperation for that one touch from Him, the times I just kneeled down in the presence of God to acknowledge that He is the Lord of my everything.

His presence in my life, is more precious than anything the world can ever offer.

Nothing in this world, can take me away from You.
Our love goes on and on.

Future.

Recently wherever I go, one question that people will always ask is,

“How’s work?”

Haha I think by now many people still don’t really know what exactly am I doing in Giraffe Snake Kangaroo (The initials of the words, cos I don’t want to spell out the actual name in case I get discovered hehehe).

I work in the pharmaceutical products department, and we are the ones who sell the medicine/medical products to the doctors in hospitals and the public clinics. And so, our customers are actually the doctors and pharmacists. The department I’m working in specializes in dermatology products, so we manage products that help patients with skin care problem, dry skin/eczema, acne problem, etc.

Basically, my job scope is a mix of Marketing + Admin + Operations Management. But mostly the first 2 of course. But I really thank God that I get quite a wide exposure of things in this company, and my supervisors really do give me the opportunity to learn. They let me attend meetings, trainings even though it is not really needed, just so that I can learn the processes in the company.

Throughout this internship period, I’ve been talking to many of the permanent staff in the company, asking them how is working life like, and how is it like to be part of this company. I guess I just wanted to discover for myself what things would be like for me 1-2 years down the road when I enter the workforce. And I just wanted to have a clear picture of what I really want as my career.

I always had a very vague picture of how I want my future to be. I majored in Marketing and HR because these 2 seem more appealing than all the other business majors, but even so, I don’t really know which specific part of Marketing, or HR do I want to venture into. But yes, I guess I do prefer Marketing over HR.

Recently, I seem to have a voice inside me that is giving me a direction, and I found it rather amazing. I don’t know where this sudden answer within me came from, but I know that if I were to really specialize in Marketing in the future, I would want to go into the cosmetics/beauty/skin care industry. And whenever I think about it, this company keeps popping up in my mind.

I just want to specially mention that this industry has never came across my mind, ever. I know that I wanna do Marketing, but I never had any idea where it would be, even after I started my internship. But now that this answer came up within me recently, I just began to realize that “Hey… I am actually working in a dermatology department now!!!!”, and this will be a really good experience to work towards my goal. Even though all along I have always been interested in cosmetics/skin care, but I had never considered doing this as my career, which I found it puzzling too. But it seems like this recent “voice” has became a great reminder for me.

When I look back, I find it such a coincidence that everything is piecing up together, and at least I have a clearer idea of what I want now.

But wait, there’s no such thing as coincidence.

Only God-incidence ;)

My Greatest Honour.

Last week, Enoch and I went to support our dearest Felicia for her SMU Ambassadors’ Investiture. Felicia has always been one of my closest friend in SMU, and I really feel so proud of her for shining in school and being a wonderful testimony! :)

However, attending the Investiture reminded me of many things.

I came to realize that by the time I go back to school officially after my internship in July, it would already be my 4th, and most probably, last year in SMU. Honestly, I can’t help but feel disheartened that over the past 3 years in SMU, I haven’t really been an active student in terms of the campus activities and club involvements. When I look back at my undergraduate years, it is sad to say that I don’t really have any school achievements. Not even one that I can count and feel proud of.

I don’t really know how to describe how it feels to have such a discovery. Slight regret, yes. (I will elaborate why only ‘slight’ later on.)  But one thing that I constantly questioned myself was, Where is the “me” that used to be so passionate about things like these?

Ever since I was in primary school, one thing that I had always enjoyed was being a student leader. From P3-P6, I was the class monitress every single year, in P6 I was the Head Prefect of my school, and also the main student leader for both my CCAs – Chinese Orchestra and Art Club.

When I went to secondary school, I held class committee positions almost every single year. I was the Chairperson of Chinese Orchestra, I was a student councilor, and I was in the top 7 positions of the Council Executive Committee.

In JC, I continued to be the Chairperson of my school’s Chinese Orchestra, which is one of the best JC COs in Singapore.

In SMU, I became the… nothing.

Please don’t mistake the above for trying to show off all my positions, I was just trying to list out everything to show you the drastic difference so that you understand why exactly am I feeling this way.

The biggest reason why I am not that involved in SMU Student Life even though I have always been one of the most enthu students in my previous schools, is because of a decision I made. A decision to focus more on my ministry in Church rather than what I can do in school. Over the past 2 years, because of the various ministry involvement on my plate, plus attending SOT last year, all these were already challenging enough for me to juggle after adding on my heavy school work. Too much for me to actively participate in any student clubs in school. And so, instead of wanting to ‘fight’ for positions in school and become someone prominent, I decided to take a step back and be someone ordinary in school in order to serve in Church instead.

I am not saying that it is impossible for anyone to excel in school and also be faithful in serving in Church. It is definitely possible, and that is why we always talk about the cultural mandate. But for my case, I guess personally, it was just out of my capacity to do so.

To speak the truth, yes, I do feel envious of all the other SMU students who have found their passion in school, and not only that, but also their close university friends who are in the same clubs as them. They can graduate with a wonderful portfolio of their school achievements, which might probably help them win the favor of their future employers. And yes, I do miss being an active student leader in school, and I wish that I had a more fulfilling SMU experience. A part of me wished that I had done more over the past few years.

However, when I look back, I realized that instead of feeling regret, I can choose to feel thankful :)

In the past, probably because of all my leadership experiences, many people would describe me as somebody rather bossy, dominant, confident, ‘chiongster’, etc etc. But now that I’ve taken a back seat and became an ordinary person, I begin to realize that actually over the years, I have really changed a lot in my personality :)

Taking a back seat to be just an ordinary person instead of always wanted to lead and be in the limelight has taught me a lot about humility. Instead of always having the influence to tell people what to do, I get told by church leaders about what I need to do. Sometimes, I even have to do things that I don’t like, that I drag my feet to do. I guess this is just a taste of what we always say, “The greatest is the least.” Serve, serve, and keep serving instead of being served. Through the years, I’ve also learnt that above any position and responsibilities, it is human relationships that matter the most. And so, over time, I’ve learned to cut down on the bossy and dominant side of me, to learn to become more accommodating and understanding towards people.

Serving in the House of God has been a really great joy for me personally. I may no longer be in Chinese Orchestra, which I was in for about 9 years, but I have found a new passion to sing for a greater purpose. While my SMU school life only last for 4 years, I know that this Church and ministry that I’m helping to build is for a lifetime. I have been serving for close to 4 years, and I have enjoyed every single bit of it, and serving with my spiritual family. I’ve done things that I never thought I could do, I’ve learnt to overcome my fears, and changed both inwardly and outwardly. It may seem like I am leaving SMU empty handed, but actually, my hands are full of the goodness and faithfulness of God in my life.

And so, my passion has moved towards a greater purpose. And I want to be as passionate in serving God as I was when I was younger :)

Was it worth it to sacrifice a pretty looking portfolio to serve God?

Perhaps there will be people who will shake their heads at me and say that I am overly religious, unrealistic, myopic in my decision. But I will still say,

Yes definitely :) And it is my greatest honour.

Summer Season.

Hot & dry. Fighting wars. Overcoming weaknesses. Getting filled. Enlarging capacity.

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes,
you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist,
with the breastplate of righteousness in place,
and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.
In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith,
with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

“After He went through the summer season of faith, He came back with the power of the Spirit. He came back fully anointed.”

Our 1st Vday.

I was in the office doing my work and was feeling rather unwell because it seemed like I was experiencing some allergic reaction, probably due the lunch which I had.

“I know what would cheer you up! :)”

“What? :(“

“Come out of your office now!”

And so to my pleasant surprise, he came to my office to look for me with a bouquet of flowers! :) I honestly didn’t expect it because it was already past lunch hours and we were both working. He even prepared a polaroid camera and we ended up taking photos in front of my office building, with many curious looks from people working in that area. Hehehehe.

I didn’t have any idea where we’ll be going for dinner because he told me that he will be planning everything and I was supposed to be kept in suspense. And so..we had our Vday dinner at OverEasy at One Fullerton, and it’s a really pretty place! Our first visit there and we really enjoyed it :)

 The food was not bad, but what I loved most was the nice view of Marina Bay Sands, Singapore Flyer and the skyline. It got even better at night! Because we sat at one of the best spots, we got to see the entire MBS laser show directly in front of us. A really awesome sight! :)

My favorite part of the day was definitely the ‘card’ that I got! Hehe. For the past week, every single time when I asked him what he was busy with, he would say, “Nothing much. Facebook, Twitter…”. And so he finally revealed what “Nothing much” stands for. Haha.

But of course, I shall not reveal the content :P

We kept talking about how one year ago, we already spent Valentine’s Day ‘together’. Haha we were studying in the school library with Enoch and Felicia for our mid term exams, because we were all single. Haha. I would never have expected that one year later I’ll be spending my Valentine’s Day with this guy. Haha!

And just to do some recollection, this was what he gave me as a ‘Vday gift’ one year ago. HAHA. I was having a rather moody day because there were some problems with my laptop. FYI, we were purely friends then. Haha.

As surprising as it might sound, this is actually my first time REALLY celebrating Valentine’s Day with a loved one :) At the end of the day, Valentine’s Day is really not about how expensive the gifts are, how big your bouquet of flowers is, or how posh is the restaurant you visit. I felt like I was the happiest girl, because I think the most precious gift this special day, is knowing that you are loved :)

Thank you for a great Vday my dear! Love you :)

HTHT

“Because serving is ultimately to serve God, and God does not care about your position in your serving, only your attitude in it.”

I will rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and give thanks in every circumstance :)

Come to Me, all you who labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light. – Matthew 11:28-30

<3

I was serving in the Choir during Saturday service, and came down from the stage as usual after serving to get back to my seat. To my surprise………..

There were roses and paper bag at my seat! I thought somebody accidentally left their things on my side (Because JC wasn’t in Sat Service) but my cg members told me that it should be mine. I decided to check what’s inside the paper bag and there was a card!

“Hello Dear! No daisies, but pretty red roses for my princess in red! Love you, looking forward to spending time with you soon! Enjoy service!”

And inside the bag was my favorite hazelnut macaron! Yayyyy.

And……..I felt like the luckiest girl in the entire service :)